THE TRANSITION IS THE TRANSFORMATION
The seasons are in tension—winter holding on, spring pressing in. It reminds me that I don’t need a clean break to return to what grounds me. Routine, rhythm, health—I’m already moving in that direction.
Where Shadows Begin to Soften
Life happened recently.
Not in a dramatic fall-off-the-cliff kind of way, but enough to pull me off course.
I didn’t go back to who I was, but I also wasn’t my best self.
And now, I’m in that middle space—finding my way back.
Today’s walk felt like a mirror of that process.
Snow on one side of the trail, buds on the other.
Cold wind, warm sun.
Winter and spring in tension—just like the version of me I’m stepping out of,
and the one I’m stepping back into.
The transition is the transformation.
It doesn’t feel clean. It rarely feels triumphant.
But I’m no longer afraid of this middle space.
Because I’ve learned: it’s impossible to be my best self every day.
What matters is that I keep moving. Keep listening.
And keep honoring this in-between place
where the shadow softens and something new begins to take root.
My Transform Shadows Framework
This is the framework that I use to explain my ongoing mental processes to build successes and handle failures in my health journey and my broader life.
Naming my shadows honestly lives at the foundation of making any change. I have to start from a position of honesty in order to change myself. Being honest about binge eating was particularly challenging for me. Once I accepted that as my reality, I could face it.
Facing my shadows moves me from speaking my truths honestly to acting on these truths. For me, there is a distinct difference between naming and acting — largely because I lived for so long knowing what I should do and not doing anything.
Understanding my shadows allows me to act for success. Misinformation about health, wellness, and weight loss permeate society. A big part of my journey includes the process of uprooting misinformation. Understandings that I can feel from inside of me help the most.
Fighting my shadows centers the ongoing battles of working against my instincts and the constant pressures for unhealthy living from the world around me. Some days, the fight runs deep in what feels like a losing battle. Giving up was my action of choice for way too long. The verb nerd in me now centers action verbs – actions that have positive results.
Reframing my shadows redefines how I understand and perceive ideas, actions, and myself. I have learned to love foods I used to hate. I understand hunger and eating when hungry differently in myself. Learning to see myself, foods, and concepts in new ways has empowered me.
Transcending my shadows describes the state of living where all the changes seem effortless, normal, and natural. In this phase, I wonder how I could ever struggle. Perhaps most importantly, I feel a sensuality of wellness that permeates all aspects of my life. And, I always want to come back when I leave this wonderful place.
